If-

When there are so many awful things happening around us, it's easy to become cynical about the world, and to lose faith in humanity.  Andy and I have been especially reflective as we consider bringing our little Nugget into this world--a world of senseless violence and hate.  It's easy to forget that the world is also full of hope, love, and goodness.  It can be difficult to remember that these virtues still exist in the world today.

I awoke yesterday with a poem in my head--and this is the life that I want Nugget to have.

If you can keep your head when all about you,

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too; 

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,

Or being hated, don't give way to hating, 

And yet, don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,

If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truths you've spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

And stoop and build 'em up with worn out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!" 

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings--nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

If all men count with you, but none too much,

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,

And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son! 

-Rudyard Kipling

Big Bend Babymoon Bonanza

One of the benefits of working in a program that follows a school district calender is that, even as a grown-up, I still have a Spring Break.  And, luckily, Andyface had some vacation time that needed using . . . so we decided to steal away to Big Bend National Park in (very very) southwest Texas.  This is very likely our last grand adventure to precede the huge adventure known as parenthood.

Our original plan had been to explore the Pacific Northwest, a place neither of us have been, but are very interested in.  Unfortunately, what with the Sequester and all (what? you don't receive government funding for your vacations?), we realized we should downscale.  Next option was a possible road trip to the Grand Canyon, though if we made that drive, we'd barely have any time to enjoy the Canyon itself.  So, after kicking around a few more ideas, we landed on the winner: Big Bend National Park.  A mere 8 hours from home, cheap, and impressive.

I'd been with my family as a kid, but Andy had never been.  Despite that Spring Break is the busiest time of year for the park and all the reservable campsites had already been spoken for, we decided to try our luck and head that way anyway.  With a forecast of highs in the mid-70s and lows in the mid-40s, we just couldn't pass it up.

Turns out we were right.  It was an amazing trip.  So, I'll stop my blabbering and just show you what I mean.

This was our first night, in a little campsite just outside of San Angelo, TX.  Since we both had obligations on Monday morning, we left Monday afternoon and stayed halfway between home and our final destination.  It was a pretty quiet little park, and we were lucky enough to see about 20 deer grazing in a field across the road from our spot by the lake.  It was a special moment! 

After a good night's rest, we headed off to Big Bend.  Our first stop was to see the Rio Grande at Boquillas.  Look!  I can see Mexico from my house!  

 

I really wanted to go to Mexico.  (When I was there as a kid, my family went across in a rickety boat rowed by a Mexican national.  We drank some Mexican cokes in a cantina, bought some bracelets from kids on burros, and were back in time for dinner.  My one experience on Mexican soil--Andy wouldn't let me swim across this time).  

While down in Boquillas, we also met this guy (in his own words) "Victor Valdez, el muy famoso cantante de 'Las Mañanitas' ":

I love the way his voice echoes on the canyon.  (I used to have this fantasy of being huge and playing my cello sitting on a mountainside, but after hearing that, I think my new fantasy is to play in a canyon.) Read more about Valdez and Boquillas here.   Interesting stuff.  Apparently, pre-9/11, it was legal to cross like my family and I did years ago.  Also, they're soon opening up another formal crossing there.  We should have bought some stuff to Stick It To The Man, but we did give Sr. Valdez a donation. 

 We climbed a mountain, too.  Lost Mine Trail.  The view was breathtaking.  Nature is awesome.   

The next day, we hiked up Santa Elena Canyon.  We came at the perfect time of day, just as the sun was starting to set.  The light in the canyon was so soft, and the shadows were striking, too.    

What a good looking fellow, enjoying looking up at the canyon. 

26 weeks! This was in our 7th mile of hiking for the day.  Not gonna lie, one of my favorite moments was when, on one of our hikes, a woman passed with a big smile, and said, "Wow!  You're brave.  Good for you!"  I'm hardcore, y'all.  

Perhaps my favorite picture of us from the trip.  Tired (we'd hiked 11 miles in a day and a half) and stinky, but happy. We were just about to head home, but not before stopping to enjoy some more of the scenery.  

It was a much-needed, and thoroughly enjoyed, vacation.  We learned a lot (it was only our second camping trip together, after all), and grew closer as a couple.  It was so good to be able to reconnect and remember why we love each other, especially as we are facing the big transition ahead.  

Finally, a shout-out to my sweet love.  Thanks for sticking with your preggie wife and taking those easy hikes nice and slow for me!  I love you!  

Wait, Wait . . . Don't Tell Me!

". . . the NPR News Quiz."

Andy and I are big NPR nerds.  One of my biggest celebrity crushes is on Ira Glass (host of This American Life), and we listen to more NPR podcasts than any other kind.  It's our first radio preset in the car.

So when our lovely friends Allan and Jen let us know that they would be unable to attend the live taping of the show "Wait Wait . . . Don't Tell Me," and offered us their tickets, I was so excited.  We'd wanted to go to the show, but by the time I'd thought seriously about it, the show was all sold out.  Imagine my delight when our opportunity arose again.

I decided to keep it a secret from Andy.  I told him we had a date on Thursday night, and that he would be really excited.  His guesses were hilarious.

"Are we going to an REM reunion show?"

"I know!  You got us tickets to the Bureau of Printing and Engraving!"

"Are we getting a puppy?"

It was really hard not to spill, but I kept it in.  So, after work on Thursday, I picked him up and we took the DART rail to the Arts District in Downtown Dallas.  He'd figured we were going to the Arts District, but still had no idea.

On the train.  Clueless.  

We got to the beautiful new Winspear Opera House, and he still had no clue what was going on.  I pointed out the crowd to him: mostly Hipsters and Rich White People (and, of course, opera-singing truck drivers).  What do they have in common?  Still, no idea.  

What could it be? 

There was a little snafu with our tickets, so we had to get them reprinted.  The Rich White Lady in front of us in line asked, "So, did you get yours through the station, too?" Andy decided that meant that the tickets had been won on the radio.  Closer . . . 

The moment of realization came when we were in line to get our seats, and someone behind us said, "We are huge NPR geeks at our house." 

Ohhhh, I get it now!!  

The above was taken just as he figured it out.  He was excited, obviously.  Nerd.  

So, we listened to them tape the show (you can listen here, if you're interested).  There are three panelists, plus hosts Peter Sagal and Carl Kassel.  This week's panelists were Paula Poundstone (everyone's favorite), Tom Bodette, and Kyrie O'Conner.  (On a sidenote, I wonder how many of you, like me, knew Paula Poundstone first from these spots on PBS.)  It was really neat to be there, with (as Peter Sagal said) "every Liberal in the Dallas area," and to see how they do what they do.  

The guest on the show was Erykah Badu, who is a native Dallasite, and absolutely adorable.  Did you know she is also a trained doula?  I have always liked her very much, but now I kind of have a girl crush on her.  Sigh.  

After the show, we were able to go to a dessert reception, and shake hands with the hosts and panel.  It was good times, and the desserts were good, too.  

Andy with host Peter Sagal.  Peter was less excited about the photo op than Andy.  

The reception ended up a little weird, as my mom called and we found out that the family dog (Zoe, a 15 year-old Beagle) was put down earlier that afternoon.  So, it was a mix of a lot of feelings. 

To thank Al & Jen, I baked some cookies.  Cookies are the best thank you--I agree with Jen.  :-)  Plus, I'm always down with an excuse to bake.  This time, our pantry was a little sparse (no granulated sugar? How did that even happen?!), but I remembered a recipe that used only confectioners' sugar, and used that. (The original recipe is for Lime Meltaways, but we had only lemons. They turned out delightfully with the lemon, though.) They're super easy, and have a nice, light flavor.  

For your enjoyment: 

Photo from MarthaStewart.com

Lemon Meltaways (adapted from Martha Stewart's: Cookies, which is a great book, btw)

3/4 cup (1.5 sticks) butter, room temperature

1 cup confectioners' sugar

Finely grated zest of 1 lemon 

2 Tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1 Tablespoon pure vanilla extract

1 3/4 cup plus 2 Tablespoons all-purpose flour

2 Tablespoons cornstarch

3/4 teaspoon salt

1. Put butter and 1/3 cup sugar in bowl, mix on medium speed until pale and fluffy.  Add zest, juice, and vanilla, and mix until fluffy.  

2. Whisk flour, cornstarch, and salt together until combined. 

3. Divide dough in half and form into log, about 1.25 inches diameter.  Roll into plastic wrap and refrigerate until firm (about 1 hour).  

4. Preheat oven to 350F.  Remove plastic wrap from logs and cut into 1/4-inch thick rounds.  Place rounds one inch apart on baking sheets lined with parchment paper or Silpat mats. Bake until barely golden, about 12-13 minutes, rotating halfway through.  Transfer onto cooling rack to cool slightly.  While cookies are still warm, toss in remaining sugar in resealable plastic baggie to coat.  

THANKS, A & J, for a great night and good times.  We'll bring more cookies when we come to game night SOON.  What's your favorite cookie??  

Welcome 2013

So, 2012 was yet another hyper-eventful year in our existence.  One year ago, we were geared up for Andy's last semester in grad school, with no idea what was ahead, or where on earth we might end up in the months that were to come.  In February, Andy got the call about his current job at the IRC, and word that they'd like for him to start in March.  Since he wouldn't graduate until April, this created a need for some finagling of coursework.  He talked to his professors, who (some more begrudgingly than others) agreed to let him finish his last semester via correspondence while living in Dallas to start his new job.  

I, on the other hand, wanted to finish out my commitments at Prospect Park, the place I love so dearly, in Pittsburgh.  So, we spent the next three months living a half a continent away from one another.  It was difficult. We talked every night, we Skyped a couple of times (though I found it actually made me miss him more, so we didn't do it too often), we scheduled a few visits back and forth.  Meanwhile, I was applying for work in DFW.  

In late May, I got a call back about a job I'd applied for.  It was a perfect fit--full-time, in my field, not too far . . . except they wanted me to start before the end of my term at Prospect Park.  Boo.  After more than a few teary conversations with Andy, we agreed that we should just go for it.  I reluctantly gave up  my post, I started packing up our tiny attic apartment, and Andy flew out to help me drive back home

   

With my students on my last day at Prospect Park.  

Putting our lives in so many boxes . . . 

Not too soon after, my full-time work turned into part-time work, and I took another part-time job at an After School program, working with mostly refugee and immigrant kids in Kindergarten and 1st grade. I loved it.  It reminded me a bit of Prospect Park, fulfilling a need to connect with children who have not been quite as blessed as the kids I was serving at my first job.  It awakened in me my sense of fulfillment.  Eventually, I stepped away from the first job and held only to the second.  

In the midst of all this work transition, I peed on a stick and it said a thing: Pregnant.  New chapter.  I didn't believe it.  Could it be true? I peed on a few more sticks, and they all said the same.  As soon as I was working only one job, I made the appointment with the OBGYN.  I suppose it hit me when we saw the little Nugget squirming around on the ultrasound, and then heard its little heartbeat.  It was true.  There is a baby inside me.  

This year, we also took our first camping trip together.  We went kayaking. We went to concerts. We saw the Dallas Opera perform the Marriage of Figaro in a simulcast from the new Cowboys Stadium.  We had three Christmases.  We laughed a lot.  We cried some.  We ran a 5k. We lost 20 lbs. combined. We found out Andy is related to a legendary mountain man who killed cougars and ate them to acquire their feline powers.  It's been a good year.

Oh, you know . . . just going to the Opera, in jeans.  While eating hot dogs and nachos. 

Plano Balloon Festival 5k.  Woohoo! 

Also, I painted THIS awesome thing.  Who knew I could paint?

So, we concluded 2012.  We are very grateful to be in this special time in our lives surrounded by friends and family.  Will 2013 be awesome too?  Yes, I think it will.   

Cheers, and happy new year! 

Where the Buffalo Roam

This past weekend, we took a retreat to the Wichita Mountain Wildlife Refuge near Lawton, Oklahoma. Despite the cold (overnight low was 30F) and the wind (gusts up to 35mph), we still managed to have a great time on our first camping trip together.  Looks like we'll need to buy a tent after all!

 Our little home away from home.  Thanks, Travis, for letting us borrow your tent!  

Our lovely campfire.  Since neither of us had really built a campfire before, this was a big accomplishment. Nice and warm, too! 

 We hiked Elk Mountain while we were there.  It was cold and really windy at the top, and I didn't want to fall off the mountain, so we didn't stay too long up there. 

Feeling hardcore as a pregnant lady who just camped in sub-freezing temperatures, and then climbed a (n admittedly puny) mountain. 

Us at the summit.  The day cleared up quite nicely, despite that it was quite foggy when we woke. 

Meet Buffy, our new friend.  She wouldn't come home with us, though. :-(  This photo was taken earlier in the day than our hiking photos, so you can see how foggy it was before. 

Prairie Dog Town--not to be missed!  They're so cute and chubby.  We wanted to take one of these home, too.  His name is Sgt. Pickles McGee.  

We also saw and / or heard a flock of wild turkeys, a pack of coyotes, some ducks, some migrating Canada geese, a cute little bunny, and some Texas longhorns (the animals, not the UT fans).  It's a great little haven, if you get a chance!  

So who's coming with on our next trip??

FAQs

Yes, it has been a while since our last update. It certainly hasn't been for lack of fodder for posting, but just that the blog hasn't been the right forum to discuss what has been happening.  It has been a whirlwind of change: I started a new job, which meant I was working two jobs and out of the house from 7:15am until 7:00pm daily, and eating lunch in the car between jobs.  Then, I subsequently resigned from the first of the two jobs, which cut 40 daily miles off my commute, and lots of stress out of my life.  In the midst of all of this . . . 

THERE IS A BABY IN MY UTERUS. 

It's nuts. 

So, on to the FAQs: 

How did the baby get there? 

I am not sure.  I've spent a lot of time with children and babies in the past couple of years.  I think I must have caught it, like the flu.  Also, I'm not sure how the baby transfers from my belly to the little blanket in the stork's mouth.  You'll have to ask your mother.  

When is your due date? How far along are you?  

June 18th.  Andy's birthday is on June 9th, and Father's Day is June 16th this year.  Oh, and my school year ends June 11th.  That puts me at 12 weeks on Tuesday.  

How do you feel? 

Thanks for asking! I feel fine--insomuch that at times, I don't feel pregnant at all.  I haven't been sick once.  The most I've felt is a bit of fatigue and some aches and soreness.  Also, I feel pretty hungry.  

Is it a boy or a girl? 

Don't know yet.  We'll find out, but we're not into the whole "pink and blue" bit, so it will mostly be to mentally prepare ourselves for the outcome.  You know, and help us choose a name.  

Speaking of names, have you thought of any? 

Not really.  If you have any ideas, please send them our way! 

Who was the first person you told? 

After our immediate families, the first person I told was my girl Januka, a Bhutanese 65-year-old who speaks very little English.  She was my English student in Pittsburgh, and calls me every couple of weeks just to shoot the breeze.  She says she wants to come visit me and the baby.  

Any cravings? 

Nah.  I've been eating a ton of eggs lately, so maybe that counts.  But at the same time, I am not really sure that my constant desire for sweets and fatty foods count as "cravings," and not just "fat kid disease," which I suppose is a condition that pre-dates the pregnancy. 

How did the cats react when you told them? 

Yunus is happy, and has taken to protecting my belly and giving extra massages to the baby.  Annie is just too wrapped up in her own cuteness to care, really.  

Also, here's a picture of Nugget, taken at 10 weeks.  Love that little belly! 

Run for your life!

Until a few years ago, I never considered myself as anyone who could run.  Running was for skinny people.  Fit people.  Not chubby girls who used to place themselves strategically on the playground to avoid having to play sports with the other kids.  (True story. And speaking of the playground, I first developed body image issues there.  Stupid seesaw.)

Nevertheless, I'm back into my training.  I'm doing about 2 miles now, and proud of it.  It's hard for a chubby girl to run.  You could strap a couple big ol' bags of flour on your back and try it if you don't believe me.

I digress.  I wanted to tell you the story of the very first mile I ever ran.

I'd been sort of training for a race.  Not following a plan, just kind of running when I felt like it, interspersed with walking (and, let's be honest, it was really just mostly walking).  It was less than successful.  But race day came nonetheless . . .

It was the Cowtown, and we were doing the 10k.  Starting shots fired.  And then this happened:

From the actual 2010 Cowtown Race. Running News Online. 

But it felt to me more like this: 

Image from the Pamplona, Spain.  The Telegraph. 

My choices were: (1) to run, or (2) be trampled.  

I ran.  There was adrenaline, there were 36,000 feet running with me, and I ran.  I ran until I realized I'd just passed the first mile marker, and then I thought I was going to die.  (Didn't.)  

We've got another race in just a couple weeks, and I think this time I'll actually be able to finish the whole thing running--or at least shuffling.  Plus there will be hot air balloons.  Wheeeee!